Some Things I Learned as an Adjunct English Professor (in my first semester teaching)

(In no particular order)

1. Too much exposure to passive voice can make one delusional.

2. Know your physical peripheries: the desk is in the same place as it is always in, be aware of its placement in relation to your body. You can and will bounce off of it (and it's best to call yourself out on this... somehow).

3. Do not attempt to scale a random bag of potting soil at 8 a.m. Sprained ankles hurt and the focus on teaching is lost when body parts throb.

4. Set three alarms for 8 a.m. classes.

5. Many will fail to tell you when you are teaching with your jacket on inside out/ turn on the light in the morning when getting dressed.

6. ALWAYS check the marker you are writing on the board (it may be permanent and permanent markers do not erase easily-- even with cleaning agents).

7. Just buy a parking permit (the $12 it costs for the semester is MUCH cheaper than the endless quarters fed into the meter/ parking tickets collected).

8. Smart classrooms are at times possessed and not much can be done about it.

9.Do not leave glasses of red wine near ungraded papers.

10. If you are low on parking meter change, but have a few dollar bills, you can stick them in the Coke machine and hit cancel, and get quarters in return.

11. When the sun shines in classroom windows, the shadows on the white board can be really beautiful.

12. Boots without traction are a bad idea when lecturing.

13. Running after the meter maid and waving your arms in the air, shouting, "I'm coming. Don't ticket my car. Please don't ticket my car" can work as a method to avoid getting a ticket.

14. It's nearly impossible to grade with a pug dog on your lap.

15. Red ink is both powerful and intimidating.

16. Grading takes a lot of freaking time, and snacks are a good interruption.

17. The phrase, "Just kidding," has the potential to erase what you've just said.

New Publication!

My poem, "After 7 am," is published in the most recent issue of dot dot dash, the "Gambit Issue." I haven't received my copy yet, but I'm very excited for when I do, and happy to be a part of an international publication. The idea of themed magazines is a good one, not to pigeon-hole, but to open a discourse and to reinterpret words, meanings, definitions, themes.

Prior to submitting to dot dot dash, I didn't know what a gambit is... a wacky chess move? When one makes a sacrificing move to get ahead. So... interesting. I originally heard of the publication through a colleague at Chatham, Miss Laura Davis, her poem is published in the Feast Issue (#5). I love the design choices of dot dot dash, and decided to think about what the word "gambit" means, and if I had a poem suitable for the word/ idea. Looking through my manuscript, I found a plethora of poems on sacrifice, and I'm happy to have found, "After 7 am" a home. The poem personifies Tuesday, and approaches friendship and love.

I'll do a write-up on Issue 8 (examining other writers' interpretations of gambit) when I receive the magazine in the post.

Thanks dot dot dash! For including my work!

A Handmade/ Secondhand Christmas/ Playing a Good Santa

This year I have decided to shop only secondhand, handmade, independent, or at local shops for Christmas. Not only does it save (slightly), but it's also so nice to the earth and to the community. I wanted to avoid online shopping, but along the way, I found some great sites that have allowed me to stick to my promise to myself.

I am brought back to the times of my teenage hood, when I saved up my babysitting money, and shopped at thrift stores for gifts. Finding vintage treasures has the same magical feeling as it did then, and each gift given is bound to be unique, truly the chances of repeat gifts are cut back, and the surprise will always be bigger.

With two weeks left until Christmas, I find myself still shopping, and I figure others are doing the same. I've compiled a list for smart shopping/ unique holiday gift ideas I've fallen upon along the way:

1. Mystic Monk Coffee : For the days when it's hard to make it to the coffee shop to write, this stuff is amazing. My parents first brought home a bag from the National Cathedral in DC. I honestly could not believe the alert state my mind took after drinking my first cup. Brewed by the Carmelite Monks in Wyoming, the blends are all remniscent of their name: mystic. This is a fly high drink, and it really will make the coffee drinkers in your life happy. The coffee/ tea also makes a good gift to the self!

2. For the literary lovers in your life: Small Press Distribution is running a 40% off sale for the holidays. SPD is wonderful. I always feel good shopping with them, a hub for small presses, the non-profit company carries an excellent array of publications from the independent literary world... from Alice James Books to Zone 3 Press.

3. Etsy carries just about anything and everything colorful and unique. Among my favorites are the handmade journals.

4. Book-y earrings -- way cool!

5. Vintage books / things made out of vintage books Story-time clocks? Yes!

Happy Smart Shopping and Merry Merry Everything!